"He's probably some dorky old geek who wears bowties and lots of really bad smelling cologne."

"Yeah, to hide his body odor."

"I heard that he's a nose picker and farts a lot."

Melanie Thompson turned around in her seat and wrinkled up her nose. "Ashley, that's just gross. Ew." She'd been listening to her classmates, Ashley Strong and Karen Wilkins discuss their new science instructor, who was quite the topic of conversation ever since the school's Dean, Sister Veronica, announced that Mrs. Galloway, their regular instructor, wouldn't be coming back from maternity leave until next fall. "Give the poor guy a chance. He might not be all that bad, ya know."

Peggy McKutcheon leaned across the aisle to add her two cents worth. "I actually saw him this morning. He kind of reminds me of my uncle, only better looking."

"Where did you see him?" Ashley demanded. "What did he look like?"

Peggy smiled, pleased that she had the more popular girl's attention. "His name is Doctor Jeffrey Wigand and I saw him walking with Sister Victoria over by the teachers' lounge this morning. He has grey hair, wears glasses, kind of sturdy looking, but not really fat. He's old, probably in his sixties …maybe seventies …"

Karen Wilkins flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder and frowned. "Oh great, we're gonna be stuck looking at some big old fossil for the next six months. What's he a doctor of?"

"He didn't look that old." This comment came from Shelly Kruger, who was sitting two aisles over. "He has a PhD. in biochemistry and I saw him this morning too. He's probably in his mid-fifties. He looks like a nice enough guy."

"How come you know so much about his degree?" This query came from Paula Gordon, who had been eavesdropping from across the room, the tone of her voice full of insult and insinuation.

Shelly hated Paula. The girl was a pathetic poseur with her Mervyn's brand school uniform and cheap Payless shoes and was desperate to be popular. As if she ever stood a chance; her father worked as a trash collector, for god sakes. "My father is on St Ursula's board of directors and Doctor Wigand also speaks fluent Japanese and might teach it here next fall. He was introduced to the faculty and directors a few days ago, but I doubt that you'd know much about that, would you? " Shelly didn't know why she was even bothering to answering the stupid question to begin with, but she wasn't about to let Paula think that she'd gotten the one up on her.

"What I want to know is why he's even starting today." Melanie Thompson reached for her cell phone and flipped it open to read through her text messages again. "I mean it's like two days before Christmas break, and it's not like we have time to actually start work on any new assignments. It's just stupid, if you ask me."

"Why can't we ever get a young, good looking male teacher?" Karen Wilkins had a secret crush on her English 101 instructor, Mr. Quade, but it would take a fair amount of torture to get her to admit it to anyone.

"Young, impressionable Catholic girls might have impure thoughts, that's why." Ashley Strong always spoke as if she was the undisputed expert on any topic of conversation, and the other girls all nodded their heads in agreement. "I mean, we're not supposed to know anything about sex or birth control or even think about it. A young, attractive male teacher would incite unwholesome yearnings and possibly corrupt our virginal minds."

One of the girls glanced out into the hallway and turned to the others excitedly. "Hey, I think he's coming!"

All twenty five girls in Mrs. Galloway's second period high school Chemistry class shot to attention, tucking away cell phones, hair brushes, and various articles of make up. A few cleared their throats while others fidgeted nervously with their hair.

Jeff heard the scraping of chair legs against the ancient linoleum floor from out in the hallway, smiling ruefully as he remembered each first day of school he had ever encountered. He'd been through this enough times that he personally referred to the experience as walking the gauntlet, but his nerves were remarkably calm. Despite all the teasing from Kelly, Riley and the other women in his life, he truly believed that teaching science and chemistry to a class of teenage girls was no different from teaching a coed class.

"Good morning." He sat his briefcase down on top of his desk and faced his executioners. "My name is Dr. Jeffrey Wigand, and I'm sure you all know that I'm the replacement for Mrs. Galloway and will be your instructor for the next several months."

He took a good look at his first group of students and received a few shy smiles from some of the girls in return. "I know you all are looking forward to the Christmas holiday, and while it probably seems rather pointless to meet your new instructor so close to the three week break, I thought it would be interesting to get the chance to become better acquainted with all of you so we'll know what we're up against."

Okay, so far so good; he didn't detect one glazed over expression. "I thought it might be even more interesting if we spend the next hour getting to know one another."

He went around to the front of his desk and sat back against the edge, slipping his hands into his pockets as he surveyed his students' faces. "I suppose you may have some questions or comments about the proposed upcoming curriculum, and I'd like to hear your input. I'd also like to learn your names and a little bit about you. So, with that in mind, quid pro quo. For each question you ask me, I get to ask you one in return."

The girls all exchanged glances. Was this guy for real?

Jeff sensed their uncertainty, but dove ahead. "Who wants to go first?"

No response.

"Okay, I'll take the first shot of looking like a complete dork."

A few girls giggled and gave each other knowing glances.

"What's your name and what's your favorite TV show?" He addressed the blond-haired girl closest to him.

The girl smiled nervously while the others tried not to snicker. Why did she always get picked first? "Um, my name is Karen Wilkinson. My favorite TV show is Desperate Housewives." Whew. That wasn't so bad. Now it was her turn. "Say something in Japanese."

"O ha You Go Za I Ma Su."

Karen looked at him quizzically.

"That means good morning."

"Say something else."

Jeff grinned.

"Nani kagachigau
Matakanjiteru kanjiteru
Ore konna ni mata no hajimete janai
Kanashii iiwaketo misekakenokitai
Kouna rutte wakatteta
Nandeanataoireta wakaranai."

Karen narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "What does that mean?"

"You have the name of the band written on the front of your notebook."

Karen glanced at the Good Charlotte sticker on the front of her folder and smiled. He just translated the whole first verse of her favorite song in Japanese?. "No way. You don't listen to Good Charlotte."

"Actually, I prefer Ella Fitzgerald, but I do listen to the radio. Okay, who's next?"

The girl sitting behind Karen raised her hand. "I'm Melanie Thompson. What's your favorite food?"

Wow, he never had a student ask him that before. "Reese's peanut Butter Cups, Melanie. What do you want for Christmas?"

"A new computer."

"Next."

"Hi, my name's Ashley Strong. Are you married?"

"Currently, no. Okay, Ashley, what's your favorite color?"

Each girl had her turn and by the end of the class Jeff felt like he had just passed the grand inquisition and the students decided that for an old guy, Dr. Wigand seemed pretty cool. Five minutes before the bell rang Jeff raised his hands to quiet them down and get their attention.

"Okay ladies, we have one more day before Christmas break and during that time, I have an assignment for you."

He was assailed by a concert of loud groans and wails.

"Hey, hear me out first. This spring there's going to be a Science Fair for the local high schools, including those in Burlington, and we need a group project. I'd like for you to think seriously about this and come up with some ideas."

Peggy McKutcheon raised her hand. "You mean you're not going to tell us what to do?"

"No. I figure you're all exceptionally intelligent young women with a lot of really terrific ideas, and I'm very interested in hearing what you come up with."

"Does it have to be a group project?" This question was from Paula Gordon, who was still smarting from Shelly Kruger's earlier verbal slap down.

"No, it doesn't, for those of you who prefer to work independently. But I expect all of you to use your imaginations and come up with something really unique and different. Or at least approach something mundane and ordinary in a new and exciting way."

Just then the bell rang and the girls all jumped up out of their seats and headed for the door.

Jeff raised his voice to be heard above the din. "Review chapter 6 of your chemistry manuals, as there will be a quiz tomorrow. Show me what you know, ladies."

Out in the hallway Karen Wilkinson turned to Melanie Thompson and smiled. "Gee, he doesn't seem so bad. He's kinda cute in a big, old guy kind of way. And he's a lot more interesting than Mrs. Galloway. Any idea what you're gonna do your project on?"

Melanie gave her friend a wicked grin. "Contraception: Abstinence vs. The Pill and the Impractical Expectations of Parents and Educators. That ought to shake everyone up."

Back inside the classroom, Jeff let out a relieved sigh. First class of the day, and no histrionics. Looking back over towards his desk, he saw something and smiled; one of the girls had left a package of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups on his chair.

Chuckling softly as he tore open the wrapper, he could hardly wait to inform Kelly and Riley about how wrong they were. These young women hardly seemed like the hormone fueled drama queens that he had been warned about. Two more classes to go, but so far so good. Teaching at St Ursula's was going to be an enjoyable experience. He could feel it in his bones.