BEN

What the fuck happened? I wanted to rob the damn bank and be long gone, but instead I’m back here, hiding out at the Inn and locked tight in my room. No, not because I’m an outlaw … because I’m a goddamn hero!

It should’ve worked fine, even with those assholes tryin’ to rob my bank but then I saw that old codger shakin’ like a leaf and that poor woman, big and pregnant trying to get down on the floor and I guess my mind got all mixed up. I just did what I did, didn’t do no thinkin’ about it.

Then I thought for sure Sheriff Mike was on to me. The bastard asked me to go to his station, you know, where the jail cells are. Not me, I might be mixed up in the head but I ain’t stupid. And all those people hugging me and cheering. This is one very fucked up world!

And that wasn’t all … there were those few minutes when I was back where I belong, back at that last robbery me and Charlie and the boys did, back outside Bisbee. I could feel everything like I was really there. I ain’t crazy, but I swear … I was really there. Now all I want to know is how the hell to get back!

I lay back on my bed and closed my eyes real tight, thought maybe I could do it that way. My head started to hurt and I called down to the kitchen for some food. Monna is a pretty little filly. She brought up my tray herself and asked me how my day was goin’. Didn’t tell her, lied and said ‘just dandy’. Then she asked me how Tracy was doing and that was all I needed. There wasn’t gonna be no more thinking about going back to my own time that night. All I could think about after that was how to find Tracy … how to avoid the sheriff and how to keep my ass outta trouble.

CORY WENDELL WHITE

Finally face to face with John Biebe. I swear, I didn’t really know what to expect. Hell no, it didn’t go like I was imagining, but it didn’t go all that bad either. It seemed his wife was gone visiting and we had some time alone.

Biebe was pretty fucking agitated. I’d watched his movie a mess of times. First off, because I’m a hockey fan and it’s got some campy, fun stuff in it. But over the past year, as I began to put this plan in motion, I started watching it to get a good idea of who I’d be facing. This guy was a little different than that soft spoken, rational yet kinda possessive husband and sheriff I saw on the screen, but then again … why not? Just look at what this dude has gone through. I can’t even imagine being torn from my life, plopped smack dab in the middle of a new one and trying to make the best of it. Granted, it was pretty enticing back then as I understand; wild and sexy, all that swapping and lusty stuff.

But Biebe was a settled sort, found his one and only and married her. No doubt she had a mess to do with his ending up in Vermont and running an Inn. He had a kid too. No surprises there, John Biebe was a family man and who’d expect him to be anything else the second time around. But, he’d changed in a lot of ways though.

There was that graying at his temples and beard. Not a lot, but at forty-three it was time, I suppose. Personalities adjust and adapt … so I shouldn’t have been so surprised that one of those traits was his temper. Yeah, that was a little rougher than I thought it would be.

When he had me pressed against the back of the closed door with his forearm hard against my throat, fuckin’ A, I was thinking it was time for panic. I hadn’t taken into consideration the massive secret he and the others live with. What other reaction would he have? But I just looked at him. He finally freed me, his eyes still locked on mine.

“You really are Bud’s grandkid. I can see it in your face. Motherfucker. What the hell are you doing here?”

“I take it you didn’t like granddad all that much,” I grunted, rubbing my neck as he went to the kitchen. Should I follow? I took a step then decided to stay close to the door. Not like I couldn’t take the man … but what would that do for me? Get me and Gemma thrown out? Not a good idea. I waited. Got a frosty beer as reward and a grunt to sit on the sofa.

For several moments Biebe just glared at me, then he ran a hand through his hair and groaned. “I did like your grandfather, Cory. He was probably my best fucking friend. What are you doing here? Beside that stupid damn show.”

I grinned. “That stupid damn show got me two Emmys, buddy. And … it gave me a damn good reason to follow a hunch I’ve had for years. Gemma Kane is the best of the best … and if my grandfather is here, she’ll track him down for me.”

Biebe started to laugh. Damn, he looked exhausted, kinda burned out and I could tell his mind was spinning … but not about granddad. It was something else.

“Cory, you’re nuts. But … you are family I guess. I never saw a ghost in my life, felt a few … felt them here … and yeah, some strange stuff happens around this place, that’s for sure. But Bud? Why the hell would you think he’s here?”

“Like I said, it’s a hunch. This place might be the conduit. So many of you guys are here. I mean fuck, if I was dead I’d want to stay around the people who meant the most to me.”

“So why wouldn’t Bud be haunting your parents? You?”

I laughed and he chuckled too. Just the thought of granddad White haunting brought its own pretty fucking scary images. I shrugged. “My folks are gone. I move around a lot. This is where the bulk of his family is. It’s what ghosts do, John. And,” I guzzled beer. “I’m thinking it might have something to do with that whole portal thing.”

Biebe straightened in his chair, scowled. “Bud’s fucking portal is in Los Angeles.”

“Yeah, and Maximus has a portal in Rome; who the fuck knows where yours is. Every one of you has a portal but I’m thinking its all part of the same portal. Like a vacillating vortex, like the Bermuda Triangle that shifts and grows and collapses on itself. And … my theory is that the portal just might go where the men are.”

Terror, I swear it was pure terror that raced cross Biebe’s blue eyes.

“I mean … the portals might have absolutely nothing to do with granddad’s ghost, and I’m here to track down a ghost. But when you really think it through, it seems portals and spiritual movement makes sense in this situation, right?”

Biebe gulped like he was gonna faint or something.

“Hey, man. I could be wrong, you know. All I wanted to do was see if granddad is here. Maybe meet some of my family, that’s all. Then I’ll be history, John. I swear. A cloud of dust, you’ll never see my ass again.”

I watched the man’s face drain of all color, then his eyes rose to me and his head shook. “Can’t. We … we don’t let family just disappear. We … we … I dunno. How can I help you do this … search for Bud?”

“Let me and Gemma get into the left tower. We won’t touch a damn thing, won’t break anything, I swear.”

He grinned. “Nothing up there to hurt, Cory. But … I gotta say … there really is something strange about that room. Here.” He stood and went to a desk, pulled opened a drawer and handed me an old fashioned skeleton key. “Go on up, knock yourself out. And keep it quiet to the others about who you are just yet. Let’s get a grasp on all this before we cope. It’s just … kinda weird. It’s a family matter and a little delicate. No one else can know about all this yet, you got that?”

I nodded and he paced and ran a hand down his beard the sighed.

“Jesus, I never thought I’d hear anything from Bud’s offspring. I thought maybe he’d keep this shit quiet. How did you find out?”

“I’m a snoop. I found those diaries and letters before they were given to Dino.”

“Ah,” Biebe looked a little embarrassed. “So, you know all the shit.”

“Uh-huh,” I gave a wicked grin and sipped beer.

“Well, things are kinda different now. Give me a few days to figure out how to tell everyone, then we’ll introduce you. Easter’s coming; we’ve got a few stragglers who pop by for holidays. Get yourself ready for a strange family reunion, Cory Wendell White. But ‘til then, keep it quiet, ay? Trust me, you don’t want my wife or some of the others freaking out and coming at you like the Spanish Inquisition.”

“I’ll keep it on the QT and very hush … hush.”

EMILY

My heart was heavy as I arrived into work; thoughts about NYSE, lying all alone and in a coma in a cold hospital room, uncertain if I should try to hang on in case he regained consciousness, or if I should just send flowers and a sympathy card to his family and try to move on. It’s not like I had an especially active social life before I started hanging out in the chat room, but knowing that NYSE was always there really kept me going when I was at my wit’s end with work and just trying to make it through an average day without screaming, you know what I mean? Now, I just feel so empty and lonely. Funny how someone you’ve never met could have such a profound impact upon your life and just somehow manage to make things seem just a little bit easier.

Kim was sitting at his desk when I walked into the office, and he actually greeted me with what seemed like a genuine smile.

“Good morning, Emily.”

There was something different about his voice that caught me off guard – a certain lightness that wasn’t often there, at least not that I had ever noticed. Funny, I never stopped to think about it, but his voice can be rather nice when he’s not about to go off on a tangent about something.

I forced a smile, hoping that he would give me a few moments to get my bearings before going into our itinerary for the day. Setting my backpack down on my chair, I stopped short when I saw a chocolate chip muffin and a small carton of 2% low fat milk sitting on a small styrofoam plate in the center of my desk. I glanced up at Kim to find him watching me.

“I thought you might like to have someone bring you breakfast for a change.” He smiled as he watched me examine the muffin.

“Are you feeling okay?” I had to make sure he was really my Kim Barrett and not some cleverly disguised imposter.

“I’m fine. Look, I know I don’t usually buy you breakfast, but I know how you like chocolate and I just thought you might need a pick me up.”

He was being uncharacteristically thoughtful, but just maybe there’s a chance for him after all. Unless… 

“You’re not trying to butter me up to put in more overtime, are you?”

His expression darkened for just a moment, but he made a quick recovery and actually laughed. “No, no more overtime, at least not today. Hey, I like your hair … it looks different. Did you cut it or something?”

I self-consciously reached up to touch the hair at the nape of my neck. “Uh, I did … two weeks ago.”

“Well, I’m obviously not very observant, but it does look nice. It makes your eyes look darker. It suits you.”

“Okay, where is my boss and what have you done to him?”

He just gave me a wink and laughed.

Why do I feel like I’m in my own personal episode of the Twilight Zone? Don’t get me wrong; I’m actually pleased that he’s being so nice to me all of a sudden. Maybe he’s finally come to his senses, but it just seems kind of weird.

But then again, suspicious girl that I am, maybe I’m over thinking this whole thing. We’ll see how long he can keep up the Mr. Nice Guy routine. Perhaps now would be a nice time to hit him up for a raise?

KIM

Emily looked so sad when she came into work this morning that I was tempted to give her the day off, although I figured that would only give her more time to think about the unfortunate Delbert. I wish more than anything that I could just come out and tell her that I’m NYSE411 and that the vegetable in the hospital, who she thinks is me,  is really a selfish, arrogant, (and comatose) worthless twit … but hey, like she’d really believe it. I’m the arse who made her work overtime on Fridays and had her come in early on Mondays, and sent her out to pick up my dry cleaning during a snowstorm.

I have other problems to deal with as well. We submitted a very important order with a new vendor and there’s some sort of strange glitch our software. To top it off, their representative isn’t returning my e-mails and my telephone calls go straight to their voicemail. Maybe I should have Emily take care of it, but that would just make one more unnecessary task that I’ve given her and besides, if I can’t handle something like this, then what kind of boss am I?

Maybe if I started taking her to lunch on a regular basis that would give me more time with her and the chance to get her to see that I’m really not some horrible, unsympathetic monster. I want to know everything about her and want to give her the chance to get to know me…the REAL Kim Barrett. I can be a nice. Bloody hell, I can be abso-fucking-lutely charming if I set my mind to it, but will Emily buy it?

JACK

This morning over breakfast, Natalie and I discussed our plans for the next few months. The spring session is due to begin at the university soon, and I must be prepared to instruct astronomical navigation as I had done last year. There was much preparation required before classes are to begin. In addition, Kevin had set the date for the groundbreaking on our house to coincide with the spring classes, making it convenient for me to take an active part in its construction, a task I fully intend to accomplish. Although Natalie is not happy that I will be required to spend several days a week away from home, she has been the perfect little wife and understands.

We were planning which days I was to be away and mulling over hiring young Valerie to help with the twins when something extraordinary and disturbing happened. One second, I had picked up my cup of morning coffee and the next, I was holding my violin in my cabin on the Surprise. Beside me was Stephen, as astonished to be in my company as I was in his.

“Jack?” he began, his face full of alarm. “I was in surgery. What …”

At that moment, Mowatt, dear Mowatt entered the cabin.

“Sir?”

I was speechless and looked around me in alarm. This couldn’t be! I was on the ship. Sophie was at Ashgrove waiting my return. And Stephen was beside me. I was home!

“Sir?” Mowatt repeated.

Stephen whispered, “Beat to quarters.”

“Oh, yes. Right, right.” I nodded. “Mowatt, beat to quarters.”

“Yes, sir.” As he climbed the stairs, he shouted the order. But, before I could hear the drums begin, I returned to my breakfast and my coffee.

“Jack?” Natalie asked.

I blinked.

“Jack? How do you want your eggs?”

“Eggs?”

She turned and grinned, “Yes, silly. Eggs. You know, they come from hens? You like to eat them for breakfast? How do you want ‘em?”

“Oh, um, scrambled.” Chelsea and Catherine were in their bouncy chairs, cooing to each other. And I felt a sudden, strong sense of loss, one I hadn’t felt since deciding to remain here and marry Natalie. The loss of my past. Then it occurred to me … what if I was to return to the past again? What would happen to Natalie? To Catherine and Chelsea? I had been taken from my past and flung here. What if it happened again?

VALERIE PULLO

I just got home from school and wanted to go visit Emily but I had so much homework to do! I know dad worries about me getting it all done, he worries that I’m bothering Emily and Mr. Barrett and he worries that I’ll get behind in school. He got that from my mom. Well, I figured it was probably best to just go to the suite and get down to it. There were Hot Pockets in the freezer I could microwave for a snack. Dad’s gone to the vineyard and he likes when I take care of things … and I like how it feels when I do stuff without being told to. I know there was a pile of laundry on his bed this morning, maybe I’ll fold it and put it away. I like Mr. Pullo and I want him to like being my dad.

When I started up the steps I saw that guy coming down. I just looked at him. He had weird hair, long here and short there, but that’s not why I was looking at him. He stopped and smiled at me.

“Who are you?” I asked as polite as I could.

“My name’s Cory. Who are you?”

“Valerie. You’re different, Cory.”

“What? You don’t like my earring?”

“No, but you’re different in another way. Different like my dad, like Mr. Biebe and Mr. Aubrey. Different … but kinda even more different.” He was blinking and I know that’s when I’ve really confused someone so I shrugged. “Never mind. Have a nice day, Cory.” I picked up my heavy backpack and went upstairs.

Cory does feel different. So do some of the other men here at the Inn. Mr. Barrett, Chef Andy, Mr. Wade. It’s not a bad different, but it’s not like regular people. Cory felt like a mix of regular people and our men.

I unlocked the door and went to fold socks.

GEMMA

I met Cory in the lobby; he had all the equipment with him and was ready and grinning ear to ear.

“You don’t usually get into this,” I smiled and began the climb to the forth floor. My talented young producer loved the planning, loved the filming and loved the editing parts of the show … but the sitting and waiting for something to happen part wasn’t Cory’s cup of tea.

“Oh this one, I’m really into. Gemma, if we do this right, you’re going to make contact with my grandfather.”

I stopped abruptly and Cory was careful enough not the smash right into me. “Why didn’t you tell me? This could make for an amazing show!”

“Amazing show or not, this is real personal for me. Now, let’s get up there and see what we can see. Daisy’s arriving later this evening and I want this under my belt before we make the production plan.”

I continued to the top of the stairs and stepped aside while he set everything down and dug in his pocket for the key. “You don’t want your personal contact to be part of it? Good gravy Cory, this could really spike the ratings.”

“I know, but I don’t think it’s gonna make a damn difference. There’s certainly enough going on here to make a great show, maybe a two parter, what doya think, Gemma?” He grinned, pushed opened the door and gave a cavalier bow for me to enter.

As I passed through the threshold I felt it and gasped. “Did you feel that? It was like walking through a wall of warm water!” I closed my eyes and stood in the center of the unfurnished space. I could feel the normal things, the chill from the wall of French doors, the softness of the deep plush carpet beneath my shoes. The room was lined with wonderful built in cushioned benches. I sensed a confusion, like being at a circus where a thousand things were happening all around me and I wasn’t sure where to look first.

I sighed and turned to watch Cory bustle with the equipment. “We should’ve done this after dark.”

“We can,” he grunted. “John said we can come up as often as we need to.”

“Odd, I didn’t think Mr. Biebe liked the idea of us being here. How did you manage to get on a first name basis with him?”

Cory stretched a cord and plugged in the equipment. He crouched at the monitors and began to adjust the settings. “He’s kinda like … I dunno … family.” He set a pencil between his teeth and fingered the monitor and then it happened.

I was watching him when suddenly his head jerked to the side, his hair flew out and the pencil shot across the room. And I head the voice. Bold and clear as a bell.

“Cory! Cut that fuckin’ Nancy hair, boy!”

Cory had dropped to his butt; he shook his head several times then stared at me. “Uh …”

“Did you hear that?” I was amazed beyond reason! Had I really contacted a spirit without even preparing for it? Was I truly going to be able to do this for Cory? I don’t know why I asked if he’d heard the voice, Cory never hears what I hear, seldom sees what I see either until later when he checks the video. But this time it was obviously different.

He actually smiled wide. “Yeah, I heard it. He said, ‘Cut that fuckin’ Nancy hair, boy.”

I struggled to move to one of the benches on shaking legs and grasped my chest, sat and blinked. “Oh my lord!”

“Nah, not your lord, Gemma. My granddad. I’m guessin’ he hates my three hundred dollar hair cut.”

I cleared my throat and looked around. I could feel so many ghosts and spirits there, there was no way to pinpoint which one was Cory’s grandfather. Some of them were already talking to me. A lovely couple proclaiming to be the original owners of the mansion … three young men … a child … a handsome young woman … and of course the ringmaster, Brian. I was baffled. I’d never experienced anything so active or intense in my entire life! But it wasn’t until I felt the footfalls of the massive spirit of that big black bear that it struck for the first time ever … pure unadulterated terror.

“I think we’ve done enough for today. I’ll see you downstairs,” and I actually ran from the room. It wasn’t a frightening room; none of the ghosts or spirits presented even the most remote threat or emanated negative or evil energy. There were just too many of them and I was not prepared. I was overwhelmed. But the most surprising part of it all … very few of the independent energies I felt in the left tower were the same as those I’ve felt walking the halls of the Inn. Now this, I needed time to think through.

JEFF

Jamaica or the Bahamas? An Alaskan cruise or two weeks in Hawaii? How about a walking tour of Rome?

I sat down on the couch in Kelly’s living room and looked at all the various travel brochures laid across the coffee table. She’d had obviously been busy with ideas for the honeymoon and I couldn’t help but chuckle when I came across the brochure for Disneyworld. Did she just walk into the travel agent’s office and grab one of everything on the rack?

New Mexico, Iowa (Visit the world famous Corn Palace!), Seattle, Tahiti (The Paradise for Lovers), Palm Springs … hey, that looks interesting. (They have an excellent golf course.) San Diego, Wyoming, the Grand Canyon, Monterrey … Mexico City … funny thing is, I’d been to all these places, save for the Corn Palace. I had a hilarious image of us decked out in tourist attire; plaid Bermuda shorts with black socks and oxfords for me and a Hawaiian print muumuu and plenty of zinc oxide for Kelly as we tripped the light fantastic through the sights of Frankenstein, Missouri or Lollipop, Texas.

I’d been wanting to bring up the possibility of just taking off to Vegas, but now I’m kind of glad that I waited. Next to the pile of travel brochures was the February issue of Modern Bride. Looks like she might have her mind set on a traditional wedding, and even though I’d just rather have a quick ceremony and spend our time and energy on what comes afterwards, I’m not about to spoil her plans if she has her heart set on something else. I’ll happily go along with whatever she decides, because I know this kind of thing is important to a woman.

I just want her day to be special and fun.

SHERIFF MIKE

I’ve been sheriff here in Stowe for nearly twelve years. For some reason, they just keep reelecting me. No big problems though, you know it’s a pretty simple town to watch over. Even with the tourism it’s kinda quiet. I like it here, actually thought I’d live the rest of my life in Stowe. Was born here, thought I’d die here too. Back in college, I met Maggie and it almost took an act of congress to convince her to come to Vermont from Arizona to live. It’s been a happy life; we have two sons, one living and working in sunny Los Angeles and the other heading off for college next fall. Yup, I thought we were settled.

Then the boom was lowered. Maggie’s parents are getting up there. They’d moved to Sun City, Arizona after retirement and their health has been slowly deteriorating. We visited over the Christmas holidays and we both knew. It was time to step up to the plate and take care of them. Period. So now, life was gonna change big time. This Vermont mountain man was now going to live in the desert. Ah well, I like an adventure as much as the next guy. But I’m feeling a little bad about leaving Stowe.

I’m real worried about who will take my position. I talked around and discovered that only one man was planning to run against me next election. Roger Fisher. Chances are he’d win anyway. He’s young and ambitious and ready to take on the world. My question is … what does he want with a sleepy little ski town like Stowe? Something just didn’t set right about him, and the town seemed to feel the same way. I was going to be leaving them all in Fisher’s hands if I couldn’t find someone better.

Then yesterday afternoon, someone better dropped right into my hands. Ben Wade. A friend of Biebe’s; now that made it even more promising. The town loved the Inn and loved the Biebes. They were active in the community and always there to lend a hand when someone needed one. Instant Vermonters, those two.

But it was Ben Wade who turned up the hero, unselfishly controlling a robbery that could have not only taken a mess of money, but hurt a few people in the process. The man was tough, he was in control and he knew his stuff, that’s for sure.

I tried to talk with him, offered to bring him to the station and make an impromptu presentation about the town, appeal to him that the town needed a man like him … but he avoided the whole idea like the plague. Didn’t even let me get the words out, almost like he was too humble to admit he’d done something extraordinary.

Oh well, it might take a little time and we’ve got a few months before the election. Enough time for me to make sure he’s a tax paying resident of Stowe, Vermont; that he understands the small town culture, the tourist trade fluctuations and how much the people here already like him. Hell, he’s all I’ve heard about for twenty-four hours! If I can keep that momentum, I bet it would assure his election. Then I can leave Stowe knowing it’s in good hands.

JOHN

It was a beautiful sunny afternoon. I’d been fucked up all day, didn’t sleep well last night. That weird vision or whatever I had at the vineyard the other day was totally messing with my head. I didn’t like it one bit, it all felt too real.

Then Bud’s grandkid showing up like that? All his theories that mixed in with the portals? I can’t begin to tell you how pissed it all made me. Pissed for the same reason I always get really pissed … ‘cause I’m scared. What the hell does it all mean?

Riley put the baby down for his afternoon nap and it was kinda strange to be together alone in the middle of the day. I had nothing pressing and she’d decided to work a party with Chef Chris later that evening. I heard her bustling around in the kitchen, loading the dishwasher, making coffee. All I wanted was to feel her in my arms.

I went in there and wrapped her tight against me, her back pressed my chest and I kissed the top of her head. “What’ve you got in mind, John?” She turned to look at me and I dove for her mouth. Last thing I wanted was for her to be looking in my eyes. I get into more trouble that way. I swept her up and took her to bed.

It didn’t take long to have her naked and tight against my skin. I couldn’t get enough of touching her. What the fuck was gonna happen if Cory was right? If the portal came here? Took me? Jesus fucking Christ, there’s no way I want to go back. Nothing … except my sons … could ever take me back to that life. And maybe even they had faded into storybook history too. But that vision? Hearing Mike’s voice. A chill ran through me.

I lowered my face from her mouth, sucked at nipples and molded her flesh under my hands, committing every sensation to memory; making it more real than that momentary vision. Lower still I lapped at her core and tasted everything that means my life to me. I sucked at the trigger, pulled a rhythm that is our life together and I made her come. I watched and reveled at her abandon, her release of control into my hands and I wanted to cry. Everything moved real smooth. I was deeper inside her than I think I ever got before and Riley was sighing and moaning delight. But I had to stop thrusting; had to still just to feel it all, her heat, her heartbeat close to mine, even her tears against my cheek. Oh fuck, how can I tell her what I’m doing? How would she understand that I am desperate to hook onto her as tight as possible, be anchored to her for-fucking-ever? That I’m terrified I’ll just fucking … disappear? Loose her and the baby and the Inn and everything.

We totally exhausted each other and when I woke curled at her side, she was sound asleep. So was the baby. I couldn’t be still. I climbed carefully out of bed and pulled on my sweats.

I went to the baby’s room and look down into the crib. Terrance Nathan Biebe. My son. As much as the others, no better, no worse and definitely as real. I had no fucking clue I was leaving my boys like that last time. I felt my eyes burn with tears. Fuck, I don’t wanna go again. But maybe I was jumping to conclusions. Maybe it’s all just coincidence; that vision, Cory showing up. Either way, I needed to think this through.

I went out onto the deck. It was dry and warm enough although the grounds and Mount Mansfield were covered with snow. I paced. First things first. I gotta be smart about this. It could all be just stupid fears, but best to be prepared. I decided to call the lawyer first thing when Riley leaves the apartment and make all the arrangements. I need to make sure everything is in her name, check my insurance policies, but basically they’ll be good for shit, no body, no payout. At least Riles will have control over everything we have here. What else? Maybe I should get more investment into baby T’s education fund. Riles gets so tied up with things she sometimes doesn’t think about stuff like that. What else?

“What’s wrong, John?”

I turned, there she was, that worried look on her face and I forced a grin. “Nothin’, just thinking.”

“I know you, John. Something’s really bothering you.”

I took her into my arms; poor thing was shivering from the cold. “Nope. I’m just appreciating what I have, that’s all. I love you baby, you know that don’t you?”

She held me tighter. Damn, she always figures me out, but there’s no way in hell I’m gonna tell her what’s got me so fucking spooked.

NATALIE

Ever since our talk this morning, Jack’s been distracted. It’s so out of character for him. Normally, he’s exuberant even when faced with challenges. He’s the eternal optimist if there ever was one.

But this afternoon, he was so distant that he finally picked up his violin and began playing. I wasn’t familiar with the tune, but it was so full of sadness and longing that it broke my heart. And when I asked him what he had played, at first he didn’t hear me. Then he mumbled something like oh, nothing. Nothing to worry about, m’dear, then promptly put away the instrument, went to his office and closed the door leaving me wondering what was bringing him so very low.

I thought maybe that it was the idea that Chelsea had been Atia, but that couldn’t be it. Even he chuckled at the idea that Antony’s former lover had found her way back to him. And besides, ever since Gemma told us who she was, Chelsea’s been as quiet and sweet as Catherine, which Jack is very happy about. So, that wasn’t it. Then, I thought it might be the prospect of spending so much time away. But then, this is Jack. He’s used to spending long months away from his wife and children during voyages. It was a part of his life. And, as he said this morning, he will be home for a few days every week; something he couldn’t do when he was a captain in the Royal Navy. So, that wasn’t it.

Maybe if I bring him some tea and a few of his favorite cookies, he’ll open up and talk to me.